My Cousin Elmo says, “100 percent of all biting dogs agree that Vegans taste like meat.”

George Papadopoulos of the Conservative Brief always has these incredibly and sometimes misleading headlines for his Twitter posts. For instants, his latest reads, “Hunter’s ex wife is exposing it all.” The first thing I thought, knowing he likes to write ‘grabber’ headlines, was that the ex-Missus Biden was appearing in the pages of Playboy. Nope,…

My Cousin Elmo says, “Only during a hurricane can you buy a shovel, tarp and duct tape, and no one thinks a thing about it.”

My Cousin Elmo says, “So, when a baby crawls across the floor for its bottle, it’s cute, but when I do it, I need an intervention.”

It was a three-day weekend, and my friend had loaned me the use of his cabin for a short holiday retreat. I pulled in by early afternoon and unpacked my truck. Once set up, I poured myself a small glass of Candian whiskey, pulled a chair from the small table by the wall, dragged it…

My Cousin Elmo says, “I’m pretty sure I need only one more bad decision before I have the whole Set.”

Janice was a fan of horror movies and books and even dabbled in ghost hunting from time to time. So when she saw the area rug with the Ouija board design, she knew she had to have one. It became the talk of her many friends, who believed it to be perfect given Janice’s personality.…

take joy in simplepeanut butter and jelly sandwichearly bedtime yawn

Karen was excited to get her new purchase home. The Kachina doll was unlike any in her collection. Proudly she set the figure on the middle shelf next to the colorful feathered dancers. She knew he would fit right in among the others. With dinner over, she was busy cleaning the kitchen when she heard…

Helene sat on her stoop, enjoying the cool Autumn air. Her joy broke by shouting from across the street. It was Korean George hollering at someone to leave his corner bodega. A young punk hurried out as Korean George chased him, wielding a bat. “And don’t lemme see your ass in here again.” “Yeah, whatever…