Category: random

The sun wasn’t even up when a huge bang shuddered its way through the house and our dream-time. It was so loud and frightening that the dogs jumped from the bed and raced from the bedroom growling wildly.

I awoke thinking, “What the hell – did a car jus’ drive through our front room or something?!”

Immediately, I scrambled for my britches and a shirt, got dressed and headed out the front door to search for the cause of this massive noise. I quickly found it.

My neighbor had opened the heavy steel door to the extra large garbage bin he’d rented, and it slammed into our fence, which is connected to the corner of our home, causing the bang to echo loudly down the wall.

“Sorry, it was an accident. Didn’t realize how heavy the damned thing was,” he said.

I smiled, “Accidents happen, besides I’ve been promising myself to start getting up early again instead of sleeping in like I have been.”

“Well, again, sorry for waking you,” he said.

“No problemo,” I responded in pseudo-Mexican.

While he works in his backyard, my wife and I are enjoying some of the 70’s and 80’s soft-rock sounds of our childhoods.

Woke up un-sexy, again.

It’s now recommended that we also wear blindfolds to prevent us ourselves from seeing what is really going on.

COVID-19 isn’t Trump’s fault, like Ebola wasn’t Obama’s fault and SARS wasn’t Bushes and only a handful of Herpes cases were Clinton’s fault.

Let’s close down the media for 30 days and watch 80-percent of our problems, fears and political disassociations go away.

The un-concentration camp is the perfect concentration camp solution and they don’t even have to sweat train schedules.

Free association writing time…again…

The trail was supposed to be well marked with a series of red arrows pointing the way to the meeting area. But a rain storm caught up in a wind storm had blown many of the markers down or left them dangling haphazardly from the trees on which they’d been affixed.

That’s how the trio of women became lost. Using the democratic system of voting rather than common sense as taught years ago by ‘Blue Bird’ troops everywhere, the elected to move on, to see if they might find their way out of the woods.

By dark, they were so far off course that they, again via the democratic system of three to nothing, the stop for the night and seek shelter amid some toppled trees. The darkness proved to be a long nightmare as none of the three were able to really sleep, the crack, the crunch, the snapping of twigs left them awake and frightened.

Come sunrise, exhausted and hungry, they each crawled stiffly from their places and greeted the warmth of a new day with lengthy stretches and big yawns. Each was happy to have survived the nighttime and though bone-weary were ready to struggle through the coming day.

“Hey, look down there,” one cried out. She had slipped away for a minute or two in order to relieve herself.

The other two rushed to her side. Down the steep but muddy and somewhat treacherous slope was the lodge from which they had left on their hike the day before.

“So, let’s put it to a vote,” one said, before asking, “Do we go straight down the hillside or should we go find the trail back?”

The women raised their hands.

Nothing like hearing the gurgle of water as it drains from the coffee maker and then realizing you forgot to put the pot under the drip and not a drop to drink.

Saw on Twitter that Chaka Khan is trending, but couldn’t figure why. So I googled her name. Lo and behold, she’s still alive.

Obey ‘social distancing’ because facial recognition software doesn’t work properly when people are too close to each other. COVID demands it!