It’s not uncommon for women to do their gardening naked. It dates back to the beginning of time.

“For several years a mockingbird perched in that large pine by our home,” she stated. “Have you ever seen it?” her friend interrupted, before adding, “We don’t have mockingbirds in this area.” “No, I’ve never seen it, but I know that it would mock our Labrador Retriever’s bark, baying back at them throughout the evening,”…

Being given papers in order to travel without interference from police is eerily reminiscent of events I only read about in history class.

Hugh Heffner became a multi-millionaire while sitting around his house, wearing pajamas. I’m not having the same results.

Last night, I went to the grocery store. When the cashier asked me how I was doing, I answered, “I’m doing great!” “And how about you, how are you doing?” I asked in return. He answered, and then following a minor pause thanked me for asking ‘because so few people do.’

Another exercise in free association writing… With hot coffee and cup in hand I stepped out into the morning, moving from my front porch to the sidewalk. That’s where I sat down – mot jus’ anywhere, mind you – but right over the numbers that address my home. The sun warmed my back and I…

As a kid, I’d hole up in my room a lot. Mom accused me of doing drugs, thinking that ‘anti-social behavior’ was a ‘sign of drug abuse.’ Not drugs, jus’ a crazy family. It turned out to be great practice.

What if this effing COVID-19 spontaneously evolved because the Earth shifted 0.0000001 degrees closer to the sun, creating the perfect climate for a new organism to develop? Nice sci-fi story to write about perhaps…

I honestly don’t like telling the truth — and that’s a big lie! Here’s another, “Trump shut the nation down.” The reality — the honest truth — is that any shutdown of businesses, et. al., has been done by the governor of your state and mine.

The top button of my blue jeans has begun social distancing itself from the button hole of the same jeans.