AI Pariah

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it over and over as long as someone’s willing to listen—or pretend to–learn to use AI before it learns to use you. But ever since I admitted I’ve been fiddling around with the stuff—just harmless dabbling, really—folks have acted like I kicked their dog or started speaking in tongues at the grocery store.

I don’t mean everyone, of course. Some of my friends are too polite to say what they’re thinking, which I appreciate.

Others, though, seem to have dropped off the face of the Earth. I’ll send a story their way—same warm tone, same crooked humor, same number of spelling errors—and hear nothing back.

Crickets. Not even a “nice try.”

Makes a fellow wonder if they’re upset with me or just scared.

I get it, sort of. AI’s new-ish, and folks fear what they don’t understand. It’s like when calculators first came out and teachers said, “You won’t always have a calculator in your pocket!”

Well, turns out we’d have the whole Library of Congress in there too, along with our grocery list, dating history, step count, and about 4,000 blurry photos of the dog.

Still, there’s something funny about the outrage. I recall when folks first found out their smartphones were listening in on them.

There was a brief storm of righteous indignation. People were ready to throw their phones in the river—or at least threaten to on Facebook.

“I don’t want the government spying on me!” they said, while scrolling through conspiracy videos on YouTube—owned by Google—on their Android phones—also owned by Google—while telling Alexa to dim the lights.

Then Edward Snowden, pale and serious, showed up spilling the beans on how the government was recording our keystrokes and listening to our calls. People swore they’d never be part of such nonsense.

But here we are—years later—arguing with strangers on smart devices, sharing our blood pressure data with apps, and letting a robot vacuum learn the layout of our homes. Voluntarily.

And yet, some folks are suspicious of me using AI. Not to deceive, not to replace, or shape their thoughts. I’ve always thought of AI like a workshop full of tools—sure, one of them might be a chainsaw, but most days I’m just reaching for a chisel and a good lamp.

The truth is, the stories still come from me. The warm memories, the stubborn opinions, the jokes that only land half the time—those are all mine.

I suppose what I’m trying to say is, we’ve already given so much of ourselves to the machines—we might as well get a little something back. Besides, if the robots are watching, maybe they’ll learn how to be a little more human.

Lord knows some of us could use a refresher course.