Advice to the Young Man

Invent yourself
Then reinvent yourself
Work hard — play harder
Dirty hands and filthy sweat
Filthy mind and dirty laughter
Frequent the neighborhood watering hole
The local dive
Drink cheap whiskey
Drink expensive beer
Stay away from mini-umbrellas
And learn to ride a horse
Rope a cow
Ride a bull — bareback — and
Drive a stick-shift
Own a crappy truck
Walk
Keep a nice home
Mow your own lawn
Mow the neighbors lawn
No grass — get some
Shower daily or
Take a bath
Preferably with a Redhead
No Redhead —
A Blond
A Brunette
Preferably all at the same time
Only once
Keep the Brunette
And get a dog