I used to live on the cutting-edge. Discovered it to be dull.

At one time, we only had the back of the cereal box to read during breakfast, not our smartphones.

The weather was sunny and warm, perfect for a swim in the creek. But John could only sit and watch as the other children joined in.

His bedroom overlooked their old swimming hole. It had been years since any of the neighborhood kids swam there.

As he watched, John smiled, enjoying the sight of the youngsters frolicking with wild abandon. It made him wish for his younger years.

The old rope swing seemed as strong as ever as it sent one child after another out over the deeper part of the hole. From there, he remembered, he could do cannon balls, belly flops and once, he even attempted a swan dive.

“It was only once,” he mumbled.

“What did you say, John?” his nurse asked.

“Aw, nothing,” he answered, “Jus’ thinking out loud.”

The nurse step behind him, reached down and unlocked the chair’s wheels before carefully moving him towards the bathroom. It was time for John’s daily bowel program.

No one’s ever finished the question, “What Would Jack Daniel..?”

Whose the idiot that keeps shaking the snow globe? Whoever you are, set it down, leave it alone and let us thaw out!

Democrats in Virginia are into burning yearbooks. They need to destroy evidence of any ‘wrong doing’ while attending high school or college.

It was a dark, but very clear night as the two of us stood alone on the tenement roof top. Bruce had very little to say as he was thinking. After three-months of marriage he was coming to regret his saying ‘I do.’

Unfortunately, there was nothing I could do for him, as this was a situation he’d have to work out on his own. There are only so many things a guy is able to do for a friend – and marital interference isn’t one of them.

I could see his situation had him down and pressed so heavily on him that he’d taken up smoking to relieve the pressure – something I had discussed with him before. He said he could stop anytime he wanted too.

“Well,” Bruce growled in a graveled-whisper, crushing out his cigarette, “Better get home. Looks like I have milk to pick up.”

“I completely understand,” I said, ‘Being a married man myself.”

We both looked up at the beam where the word ‘milk’ shined in the center shape of the well-known winged mammal. With a heavy sigh, the Batman disappeared into the black void of the city and I wondered if I should talk to his missus, reminding her that her grocery lists are not what the Bat Light’s designed for.

Humor is the art of pointing out societies ills in such a way that even a Communist will laugh.

When you hear thunder, you think lightning, not Zebras.

Jesus says: ‘Stay on path,’ few listen; National Park Service says: ‘Stay on path,’ majority obeys.