Sometimes I simply wanna put on my dog-tags and pretend I’m in my 20’s again.

Writing an obituary is possibly the hardest tasks a grieving family has to face. Because of this, sometimes it gets set aside and may eventually be ignored until it seems that it no longer matters — I mean the loved-one is gone and so what’s the point, right?

Well, the obituary isn’t for the lost loved-one, it’s for those of us left behind and we all deserved to be remembered in some way, big or small, with our family and friends. That’s why I often offer to help write obituaries as I have a God-given gift called writing and I feel I should use it to help others, not simply satisfy my ego.

On a more personal note, I only aided with Dorothy’s obituary, it was her sister, Marie who carried most of this burden. Thank you, Marie for letting me help you and your family.

Dorothy and I were jus’ reconnecting after having lost touch for nearly 38 years, so it’s very hard to learn that she is gone before we had a chance to share all of our memories as kids and our separate recollections as adults. Rest in peace, Dorothy, my dear friend. See you soon along the banks of Heaven’s great river…

Born November 1, 1961, on her father’s birthday in Crescent City, California to Beverly (Adamson) and John Van Dusen, Dorothy Lenore Shields passed away on April 25, 2019 at her home in New Castle, California. She worked as a waitress at Thunder Valley Cafe in Lincoln, California, where she was a good friend and constant support to her coworkers.

Dorothy was born with a mothering soul and taking care of people was her gift. Dorothy even took on the responsibility of caring for her siblings at the tender age of 13. She enjoyed painting, taking photographs, playing with her grandchildren and loved her family more than anything

She graduated from Del Norte High School in Crescent City in 1979 then joined the U.S. Army, serving as a Chaplains Assistant, while stationed in Germany. Following her discharge Dorothy returned home to Klamath, California, before eventually settling in New Castle with her husband.

Dorothy cared very deeply for others and was always there to listen and to provide a shoulder to cry on while giving great advice. Loving and compassionate, she was always giving so much of herself and did all she could to help others through the difficult times in their lives.

Preceded in death by her mother, Beverly, Dorothy is survived by her husband, John Shields; son’s, John and Jacob Gregory (Shara;) grandchildren, Auron, Rylan, Charleigh, Serenity, Zane, Hunter, Jocelyn and Jameson, her father John (Jeanette); sister’s Julie Bergren and Marie Reed (Robert); and brother, Robert Van Dusen; nieces and nephews, Cevin Bergren, Rhonda Bergren, Crystal Gasser, Terah Van Dusen, Beth Clark and Dallas Reed.

Wait a minute — a starfishes mouth is at the center of their body and mermaids use starfish as bras. What sort of sneaky shit is this?

Our money doesn’t buy a thing. It’s our time that pays for it.

Our soul is more deeply buried in us than our spirit.

Jennifer Casper-Ross, then 30, used her friend’s cell phone to call her father in Las Vegas, Nevada, at around 5 am. She told him she wanted to come for visit, then she took a cab the Reno-Sparks Cab Company on Gentry Way in Reno, Nevada.

In the early hours of that May 5, 2005 day, Jennifer’s husband came home, found her drunk, and saying that she needed to leave. She had her belongings and family photos packed.

For whatever reason, she took off on foot from her Oakhurst Avenue home for the Peppermill Hotel and Casino on South Virginia Street. There, staff and guests would tell detectives that Jennifer arrived already intoxicated and that she had marks on her wrists and arms.

The cab company was where her mother would have normally been working the graveyard shift, but unfortunately for Jennifer, she had the day off. When she learned her mother was not there and being only a mile from home, Jennifer left the building, when behind it and jumped over a fence.

That’s the last time anyone has seen Jennifer.

An employee of the cab company would later find Jennifer’s broken high heels in the company’s parking lot. And her husband would report her missing that day.

At 15-years-old Jennifer was an already gifted ballerina, performing in local community events in her hometown of Pocatello, Idaho. By age 19, she’d earned a spot in Gregory Thompson’s Productions as a dancer at Harrah’s Reno Casino and Hotel in Reno.

In March 1999, she married Sean Ross, who mixed the sound and operated the spotlights during Jennifer’s performances. Four years later, the pair welcomed their son.

Jennifer was also University of Nevada-Reno student, who had majored in veterinary medicine but switched to bio-medical engineering. She was awarded the NASA national space grant college and fellowship program in 2000 and was a year away from completing her degree.

But by 2005, Jennifer’s life had begun to spin-out-of-control after she broke her tailbone practicing for a show, followed by the lost her job at Harrah’s. After being fired, she began giving ballet lessons and moonlighting as an exotic dancer.

Jennifer was also struggling with a continuing case of postpartum depression and would later be diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Having been hospitalized several times, her marriage had also begun falling apart.

In the early stages of the investigation, Sean found two bloodied notes inside the couple’s home, which indicated that Jennifer hoped Sean would continue to care for their son if anything ever happened to her. DNA and handwriting analysis confirmed that Jennifer wrote the notes and that it was her blood.

Jennifer had attempted suicide and had gone missing before for several days at a time, though never for long. This aside, detective’s have not been able to establish when the notes were originally written.

At first, Jennifer’s husband, Sean cooperated with the investigation, but after failing a polygraph test, didn’t return for a second interview. Three months following Jennifer disappearance, he filed for divorce and moved to San Diego, California.

Jennifer is a White female,  5’9″, 130 pounds with brown hair and brown eyes. Her ears are double-pierced, has a navel-piercing and a tattoo of the initials ‘J.G.’ on her left foot.

If you have any information about this case, please call the Reno Police Department at 775-334-2121.

Grace is that tender kiss given in a cold world.

My wife said her ass is jus’ right. She wouldn’t trade me for anything in the world.

Honestly, I’ve not tried to write in a couple of days. The mind’s been an utter mess. What I did have is this stupid ditty that came out of the folds and fluids of my brain as I slept off a drunk. I have no idea what it means and no idea what can be done with it. So I leave it here, where it can sit like an abandoned egg in hot weather, rotting…

while i’s ain’t no Barabbas
i’s be da guilty fellas here
ans’ as deys lets me free
damned iffen deys didn’t
keeps dat innocent man

I love horses and women. In my next life, I wanna come back as a rodeo queen’s saddle.