My Cousin Elmo says, “And this is what happens when you order a president through the mail.”

She stepped on a barefoot in her unlit bathroom. Too bad she lived alone.

Indeed, I prefer to window shop as opposed to shopping for real. Unfortunately, window shopping does not work when buying groceries. Today, I went to the market for a can of condensed milk but couldn’t find it. I finally asked a person stocking the shelves where I could locate it. “I’ll see,” he said, disappearing…

with a clock you can see when it stopped ticking but with the person you cannot always tell they are broken

Why does emptiness feel so heavy?

“A Nevada ink slinger working on a daily paper was required to stand, rarely to sit, before the type case for long hours every day, six days a week, picking up individual pieces of type, called sorts, and arranging them in a composing stick to make lines of type. It is no wonder, with the…

My Cousin Elmo says, “Inflation is nearly as high as Hunter Biden.”

When the man awoke, he was looking into the concerned face of a police officer. It took him a few extra seconds to understand that he was bleeding from a head injury. “Do you remember what happened?” the officer asked. “I picked up a rock that was painted black with yellow lettering that read, “Be…

“I heard you lost a couple of sheep this week,” she said. “Yeah, I did, a cow, too,” the farmer returned, adding, “Gone, vanished into thin air like they never were there. And who told you?” “Oh, a little birdie told me,” she smiled. “No, really, who did you hear it from because I’ve only…

My Cousin Elmo says, “Beer is now cheaper than gas. Drink, don’t drive.”