By the looks of it, the great State of Nevada is goin’ to have herself an Easter fit for a king, a queen, and at least three well-fed rabbits. According to the keepers of coin over at the Retail Association of Nevada (RAN), folks will part with a staggering $382.3 million this season—proof that resurrection is big business, even if it ain’t saving a single soul.
The National Retail Federation—bless their spreadsheets—says each reveler will toss about $189 at the altar of Easter essentials. That’s the second-highest per-person Easter-spendin’ ever recorded, trailing only the year folks mistook Easter for Christmas with better weather.
Yet for all that spendin’, not a whisper of redemption has been heard among the jellybeans.
“Retailers aren’t the only ones feelin’ the seasonal buzz—the Easter Bunny is lookin’ bright-eyed and bushy-tailed,” chirped Bryan Wachter, RAN’s Senior Vice President and part-time poet. “It’s clear consumers are embracin’ this year’s holiday with energy and enthusiasm.”
And presumably with wallets swung wide like barn doors in a windstorm.
With more than two million Nevadans joinin’ in, food is wearin’ the crown, with nearly $60 per person goin’ toward Easter feasts. That adds up to a belly-buster of a whoppin’ $120.4 million. Candy’s hangin’ in there like a good-humored toothache, with nine outta ten celebrants droppin’ a sweet $54.2 million into the confectionary abyss.
Other favored expenditures include gifts–65 percent, likely stuffed animals with judgmental eyes–decorations at 51 percent, clothing pulling up 49 percent, with pastels being the color of salvation–flowers growing at 43 percent, preferably ones that don’t perish before the Visa bill arrives, and greeting cards–also 43 percent, mostly read once and kept forever out of guilt.
As for how folks aim to mark the occasion, 58 percent say they’ll cook up a holiday meal—bless their deviled eggs. Another 55 percent intend to darken the doorstep of friends and kin, while 45 percent will give church another try, if only for the ham afterward. Over half of families with young ’uns are fixin’ to hide plastic eggs in the backyard—modern-day treasure hunts where the prize is sugar and ants.
When shopping, discount stores lead the parade at 55 percent, followed by department stores at 44 percent, the wild frontier of online streaming in at 36 percent, and, bless their hearts, local small businesses cementin’ 26 percent.
So there you have it—Easter in Nevada, where rabbits are holy, baskets are bountiful, and salvation may be scarce, but you can sure buy a perfected facsimile of it, wrapped in cellophane and marked down for the following day.
The Old Blog in the Desert 
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