Patron Saint of Poor Decisions

Last night, the missus insisted we watch Titanic once again. That fine tale of love, loss, and financial irresponsibility that only Thurston Howell III could appreciate.

The tragedy of the grand ship is one thing–the actions of our heroine, Rose, who, in the ultimate act of questionable emotional decision-making, chooses to throw away a $250 million necklace—a pendant so valuable it could have single-handedly funded the dreams of a hundred impoverished families or at least ensured her grandkids could attend college.

Let us set aside, for a moment, that Rose’s primary attachment to this necklace stems from a brief, fleeting romance with Jack–an unemployed artist who, though charming and spirited, was probably the last to one would have trusted with anything of great value. After all, when you have spent your life sketching portraits and riding in third-class, throwing away priceless family heirlooms seems like the next logical step in your emotional recovery.

Meanwhile, back in the land of the living, her husband, a man who worked diligently throughout his life to ensure Rose and their children lived in the lap of luxury, watched as she made her big decision. It is hard to imagine he would be cheering her on from the afterlife.

“Ah yes, darling, please throw away the one thing of immense worth that could secure our grandchildren’s futures. Jack would’ve approved.”

This man, who worked hard to provide a comfortable life, might have appreciated some acknowledgment in the form of –I don’t know–financial stability? Additionally, a pendant her granddaughter could have used—the woman who dedicated years to caring for Rose in her later years.

But no, Rose, in an act that would have made even the most famous philanthropists of the early 20th century reconsider their entire life’s work, decided that Jack—a man she had known for only a week—was more deserving of her symbolic tribute.

I will say it, without fear of contradiction: Rose, with her sparkling eyes and emotional whims, is the true villain of Titanic. The real iceberg was not the one that sank the ship; it was the cold-hearted decision to squander wealth for a memory that was not even that impressive.

The world could have done without Rose’s sentimental follies. Perhaps if she had made a better financial decision, she wouldn’t have had to throw a necklace into the ocean.

But who needs to make sense when you have a sea of emotion and a tide of poor decisions to ride out?