Big Teeth

While traveling towards Muskogee, I decided to stop along the highway in Arizona to stretch my legs and take care of other business. I had been driving all day and living off one cup of coffee after another from various gas stations and truck stops along the way.

It was very dark as I placed my truck in park and walked up the slight embankment to find a private spot that I could be certain that a passing big rig couldn’t illuminate as I emptied my bladder. The embankment eventually gave way to a flat surface and then another slope that took me down behind the embankment.

I felt well enough hidden as not to be concerned about being seen.

As I stood there relieving myself, I noticed shining headlights from a long haul truck as it headed eastbound.  I looked around to make sure I had selected a secluded place as I had hoped.

I was well out of the sight line of any passing motorist — however the headlights showed me I was not alone.

It took me a few minutes to slow my heart rate down after I had looked up and saw a mouth full of teeth only a few feet from my face. Then the big rig zoomed by and I found myself in the dark again.

I didn’t wait to finish peeing as I raced back over the berm to my truck.

Once there I pulled out the large spot light I had stored in my vehicle and plugged it into the cigarette lighter. Then I shined the light towards the area I had jus’ been and saw what had put the scare in me.

At that moment I wanted to kick the crud out of the person who put those stupid dinosaur statues out in the middle of that field without proper lighting. It took about an hour before the front of my pants finally dried out.

Dirty bastard!